My drug of choice when in pain is Ibuprofen. Side effects of ibuprofen is da dah ... water retention.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ibuprofen#Side_effects
"Common adverse effects include: nausea, dyspepsia, gastrointestinal ulceration/bleeding, raised liver enzymes, diarrhea, headache, dizziness, priapism, salt and fluid retention, and hypertension."
http://www.drugs.com/ibuprofen.html
"swelling or rapid weight gain;"
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